Hair Saloon difference (Funny)

Note : This post is just for laugh. No I am not a racist ok?

What's the difference between a Chinese hair saloon than an Indian or Malay(house) saloons? The following is a comparison.

Price :-
Chinese - MYR 12 to Several Ks depending where you actually have your cut and who you cut with

Indian - Liamah Linggit(MYR 5 & above)

Malay - Tujuh cukup la(MYR 7 & above). Free/Any amount you want to pay if he is your neighbour

Place :-
Basically very much the same for their location. One to many in housing areas and shops but you see more Indian barber shops more. Hey it's a job of skill ok? So be proud.

Setting :-
Chinese - Full of girls pictures ranging from Japanese and Korean etc

Indian - Full of Ang Moh(westerners) pictures (and several sample head pictures)

Malay - Anywhere ranging to the front of your car porch to the toilet. The guy will ask you what style you want instead. "Eh, Apa style lu mau? Botak ada, Kelapa ada, Ronaldo punya style pun ada"(Eh, What style you want? We have Bald head, Coconut head - cover with coconut and cut the rest, Ronaldo's style also we have)

Conversation while doing your hair :-
Chinese -
Auntie : Handsome/Pretty, you still schooling
You : Yeah
Auntie : Got gf/bf or not?
You : No leh. Where so fast got
Auntie : Ok Mah. Your age last time I already have 2 kids liao(Focus on "LAST TIME" when I buy sweets 10 cents 1 whole pack)
You : No la. Want study first.
Auntie : I have a daughter/son around your age. Want me intro? (proceeds with one endless garbage conversation that you wish you were out of there asap)

Indian -
Uncle : Kerja letih ke?(Is work tiring?)
You : Ya
Uncle : Ekonomi tak baik. Sikit orang datang gunting rambut(Economy bad. Less people come for haircuts)
You : Ya
Uncle : Kerajaan tak bagi subsidi(No subsidy from government)
You : Ya.. (getting restless because you wanted to relax)
Uncle : Harga benda pun naik(prise of goods rise)
You : Ya....(half alseep)
Uncle : Bla bla bla
You : Ya............zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....................
Uncle : Bla bla bla......
Conclusion? Uncle talk you "Ya!" till he finish cutting or else wait botak(bald) la

Malay - Silence till your hair is cut(You are afraid of that "Aiyak! Sorry ah. Senget dah")

Treatment :-
Chinese - Come, auntie help you wash your head. A lot of hair there later you feel itchy. (In your head - Wah auntie so good help me wash my head. In her head - Ngek Ngek Ngek! I get additional RM1 tips which I will charge you without you knowing)

Indian - The aneh helps you massage your shoulder, forehead to sideburn area then proceeds to twist your head to help you release the tensed feeling on your neck muscles. Crak! Oops! Leher putus dah. Mampus la kali ini.(Neck broken, Die this time). The aneh then proceeds to tiptoe out of the shop balik India(back to India)

Malay - Dah siap.(Done) and you end up scratching your head because some kutu accompanied you for a week till you get Shieldtox to spray your head.


Ps. Personally I still enjoy the Indian barber shops because you get to sleep till they are finished with your head. Some shaves for you too(with the risk of "Aiyak! Sudah putus leher!" ala Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007)

Ps. Anyone who can find a shop with barber like Don't mess with Zohan for guys let me know ya. The barber must be a model type of girl. I sense my ears are going to be twisted till they fall off soon. It's not for me lol. It's for my hamsap friends.